Tag Archives: dilemma

Missed Connection: A Visit Down Memory Lane

^I’m not such a fan of breaking the words in the wrong places, but I really like the concept. (Photo from http://www.buffalocomedy.com/)

I’ll get right into it because it’s a school night and nearing 2 am already. This is just one of those things that’s been bugging me for a while now, and even causing some restless dreams..so cliche, right? Moreover, the thoughts may have been reinforced when my family started watching the series entitled Sherlock. If you’re a fan of both the books and the past movies, I highly recommend you watch this; after all, there’s just 3 episodes to a season (and the show is currently on its third). The simple connection was this: Benedict Cumberbatch’s appearance reminded me of this guy. Of course, I don’t mean to say that he was as sexy as dear Sherlock, but he shared the general look.

When I was in my early years of high school, I was inclined to be close to some upper years because they were our ‘guides’ as to how to get around the campus, and they were our ‘seniors’ in various organizations. I was pretty sociable but I’ve never really been part of the popular ‘in’ crowd; I gravitated towards ‘more lonely’ people who seemed interesting but just didn’t have an ear to tell their stories to. If I was lucky, I’d end up with a really quiet person whom I’d gradually get to open up to me. This was (and still is, when it happens) gratifying because you can feel the person’s trust building and I’ve always found it nice, seeing them ‘come out of their shells’.

Moving on, there was this boy that I think was at least 2 years older than me; I don’t remember seeing him while I was in my junior year, but maybe I was just too preoccupied with my academics and same-age friends by then. Like B. Cumberbatch’s version of Sherlock, he was white, tall, and had a lanky frame; I think he wore glasses from time to time. He looked like he has some foreign blood, and I remember having primarily-English conversations with him. Thinking back, he seemed to prefer being by himself. Nevertheless, I distinctly remember taking walks with him around or school’s oval, something I don’t normally do with people unless we have long, interesting conversations. I truly hope I wasn’t obvious, but I had a crush on him back then. We got along quite well, although I don’t remember how exactly we stopped talking to one another..

Fast-forward to college. I remember thinking where he could have gone, if he even decided to stay in the same country. I didn’t dwell on it; I was pretty preoccupied with adjusting to college life and trying to face my impending academical challenges with renewed ardor. But one day, I saw him: it wasn’t hard to mistake that face for anyone else’s. He grew his hair out and was then sporting a shoulder-length head of curls, not that it fit him well. I distinctly remember feeling the urge to hide and at the same time wondering why he was alone, and whether he would remember me. I’d say we were quite close in high school, so who’s to say the past cannot repeat itself?

I was able to put him out of my mind in time. My classes pretty much confined me to my college’s set of buildings, and I never so much as caught a glimpse of him in the past semesters. But this semester, I’m taking a GE (General Education) class in the Archaeology building, which he seems to frequent. He got a haircut (oh yes please, now you’re looking more like Sherlock!) and looked as if he didn’t change at all since high school! Which then made me reconsider reacquainting myself with him. I eventually got curious enough to consider greeting him sometime; curious at to whether our previous closeness can be reestablished, and whether he just really preferred to be alone like before but still had an interesting personality.

I have doubts of course. I don’t remember his name. He would have recognized me several encounters before if he did remember me, but he showed no signs of recognition. I don’t remember anything specific about him, I just remembered being close to him; consequentially, I feel apprehensive at approaching him because I have no idea on how to open the conversation on a lighthearted yet familiar and welcoming note.

We’ll see in the coming days whether my curiosity gets the better of me, or not.

On other news, I’ve re-finished the first 5 books of the Harry Potter series! I’m now on the 6th book, which is just fitting as I was able to choose the corresponding films as the subject on my upcoming report in my Film GE. I’m supposed to focus on the essay; but it never hurt being familiar with the original works, right? 😉

Mr. Ollivander cried, “Oh, bravo! Yes, indeed, oh, very good. Well, well, well.. how curious.. how very curious..” He put Harry’s wand back into its box and wrapped it in brown paper, still muttering, “Curious.. curious..”
“Sorry,” said Harry, “but what’s curious?”
Mr. Ollivander fixed Harry with his pale stare.
“I remember every wand I’ve ever sold, Mr. Potter. Every single wand. It so happens that the phoenix whose tail feather is in your wand, gave another feather — just one other. It is very curious indeed that you should be destined for this wand when its brother why, its brother gave you that scar.”
–excerpt from Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone

School Tomorrow — Are You Ready?

Gee. With classes like that, who wouldn’t be hyped to go to school?
(Photo from harrypotterfandom.net/tag/elective-classes/)

It’s school tomorrow, and I have mixed feelings about it. I don’t know if I’ve blogged about this before, but I think this is something that a lot of other people also feel whenever the resumption of classes looms over us.

I don’t know if I should feel glad at the prospect of being reunited with my blockmate-friends, whom I’ve barely talked to the whole Christmas break. Taking a breather from socializing was nice, but there’s nothing like being with your currently-closest friends to make you drag yourself out of bed, even if it means getting up at the crack of dawn everyday.

On the other hand, I feel apprehensive about facing everything school represents: grades, teachers, exams, papers, you name it. I still have a whole lot of things to do (all for this week):

  • Write an essay about a local film critiquing its different meanings.
  • Watch 2 modules’ worth of short video clips (around 20+ clips) for a double-quiz.
  • Research and compile our paper (which is apparently a full-blown lab report) for a lab class.
  • Download, install, and familiarize myself with VMD (Visual Molecular Dynamics) and NAMD (*something*).

Despite the way I ended the last year (with a bang, just like my last post; I got a whopping 80++% on my Immunology exam! And this is my most decent grade yet in any subject taught by that specific teacher), I can’t help but feel sometimes that I might have bitten off more than I could chew by taking this course. I would have been tempted to wish for more time if it were Christmas; but as a Facebook friend said, there’s no point in asking for more time if you don’t have the initiative or motivation to spend that time wisely.

I guess the logical solution would be to end writing this post and get on with my paper or other requirements, right? 😉

Maybe I should just keep in mind that I’m lucky to be the recipient of an excellent education, and that I have awesome people who are also suffering having the time of their lives alongside me, by taking this course. Since I’ve finished re-reading HP #3 already (and well into the 4th book! I think I’d watch the movies after all these as well..), I can’t help but envy Harry’s enthusiasm to go back to school, even if it’s mostly propelled by the desire to get away from the Dursley’s; as well as Hermione’s willingness to learn and the way she just.. devours textbooks! I wish that girl would give me a piece of that amazing brain of hers.

“If he wants ter go, a great Muggle like you won’t stop him,” growled Hagrid. “Stop Lily an’ James Potter’s son goin’ ter Hogwarts! Yer mad. His name’s been down ever since he was born. He’s off ter the finest school of witchcraft and wizardry in the world. Seven years there and he won’t know himself..”
–excerpt from Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone

As Luck Would Have It

The four-leaf clover. Stuff of legends, this one is.

A day before our college-wide carolfest (and also the day of an exam and a ‘learning center activity’ worth ~20% and ~7.5% of my grade in those subjects, respectively), all my majors’ subjects were cancelled due to an ongoing seminar held by the Philippine Society of Molecular Biology (something like that), which my professors and selected senior students had to attend. So basically, I just had one class (4-5:30 pm) and choir rehearsals afterwards. The night before, we had a very unsuccessful rehearsal due to the lack of people present; we couldn’t get our dynamics right and a lot of people weren’t able to remember their tunes. This happening two days before the competition, in my entire choir history, was unspeakable and unacceptable; thus, we finished the night in a glum mood. Despite wanting to practice, I also couldn’t stay late tonight due to my exams. So my plans for the next night & day were:

  • Study (not just read) Chapter 2 of From Genes to Genomes (FGtG)
  • Wake up early and go to school, as usual; but stay at the library the whole day, save for lunch time
  • Attend my class at 4-5:30 pm, and afterwards, my choir rehearsal at 5:30-7 pm.

When I went home, I just crashed on the couch because I felt tired. I didn’t plan to sleep; in fact, I couldn’t sleep for nearly an hour before I did. I wasn’t able to change out of my clothes (nor wash my face, brush my teeth, the whole enchilada) since I didn’t even plan on sleeping in the first place. This was alright in the long run though, as it will hopefully help in my recovery from colds that I am currently afflicted with. But then, the universe/God decided to have a field day with me.

When I woke up and was perusing through my clothes, I decided to wear a skirt. I used a newly-bought razor to shave my legs and did so while taking a bath. For the first time ever in my history of shaving (which I do in between waxes), I got nicked, and so many times! In fact, I ended up with 3 small ones (as big as ‘.’) and 6 big ones so much for flawless legs. The wounds were the kind that were shallow but kept bleeding, so I had to hunt for some Band-aids and Bactroban (an antibacterial ointment; works nicely on wounds). Since I was running late because I was too busy stopping the bleeding, I decided to go with what I initially planned to wear; I thought that the bleeding would stop and the wounds be relatively unnoticeable in an hour. Well, I apparently had another think coming.

Before getting in the car, my grandmother made a remark to me about not getting a hot beverage whenever she’s heated up some water, but looking for some when there weren’t any. So to pacify her, I filled a mug 2/3 of the way..only to realize, once I was in the car and we have sped away, that I didn’t have any of my morning cocoa with me. #facepalm right? So I offered my sister a drink from my jug and transferred the hot water there instead. Next, when I was putting my ‘face base’ (which is a lavender-tinged moisturizer of sorts), a couple of drops landed on my dark navy blue shirt! Talk about disaster! I tried washing them away but they wouldn’t completely fade, so I just decided to ‘paint’ on a design of stitches (more on this later). I was really frustrated at this point because my wounds were still bleeding, my legs looked butchered, and my shirt was a mess. I was even starting to sweat, which rarely happened with our car’s AC. All these within the first 2 hours of the day. 😦

By this time, we were nearing the mall where I was supposed to be dropped off, since it has a jeep terminal which would have made my commuting easier. Driven by frustration, I decided to tell my mom that I’ll just go down at her office and commute from there, even though the commuting would be loads harder. I relayed my frustrations to her and she wasn’t..much help really, but she couldn’t be blamed. I even told her I wanted to cry because everything was going downhill. I possibly couldn’t be in the right mind to study with all the pent-up frustration! But when my mom left me (because she was going to be late; she waited for me for a couple of seconds), that’s when I really broke down.

I’ve never had a day like this before. I’ve experienced days when I’ve had to cram everything due that day, be it various requirements or tests and quizzes, but they have never given me such frustration. I guess it was all the little things together that just convinced me that today was doomsday, figuratively. But after crying it out (which, as Violet said, can be a really great stress-relieving habit), I composed myself and put what few Band-aids I had on the bigger wounds on my legs. I then went up to my mom’s office and told myself that I could study there even if her office-mates were noisy (I swear, it’s like a market up there. I remember asking her once how the heck she manages to get things done.)

Maybe now, my ‘luck’ would change. Once in my mom’s office, she told me that my stitch designs looked ghastly and insisted on my removing them, which I did with her soap and dried them using paper. It worked, even though it felt really cold for a couple of hours. Then, I set-up on her table and started reading FGtG. After a while, I accompanied her to buy extra food from the canteen, extra Band-aids from their in-house shop, and snacks for what I foresaw as a long night due to things I still haven’t studied. We bought pineapple slices and pork liver steak, too. 🙂 Then, their 3 pm snack time rolled around. Usually, they buy raw ingredients and just cook different foods themselves; but today, one of them treated the whole office to 4 boxes of Shakeys’ pizza! Ah, what a feast for the palette.

Afterwards, I arrived at school earlier than usual and even got to chat with my group mates and teacher. Then I went to practice, in which we fine-tuned our transitions, choreography, and mostly got everything correct. On our way home, we met up with my uncle who got a call past 8 pm; apparently, a water pipe broke/burst and the water supply was going to be turned off at 9pm! My mom and I hurried home and went about filling drums and pails. The water was turned off at 10pm.

Just starting to study now. I hope that God will guide me throughout the night, and that He, or the universe, won’t deal me any more mishaps. I also hope that I’ll still have my voice for tomorrow, even if sleep-deprived.

Hoping,

*******23

P.S.: It’s my first time writing a blog post throughout the day. I guess it’s really different when you write about what happened a mere couple (2-4) of hours after that thing happened; the emotions are still fresh, as well as the details. 8) Such a long post though.

The Week-long Irony

Definition of "irony" from the Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary.
Definition of “irony” from the Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary.

I don’t know if there’s any clearer way of explaining how apt the title is than by narrating the things that have happened to me this past week. If you’re uncertain of the definition of the word ‘irony’ (as was I, when I began writing this post), I have included a short definition of it from Merriam-Webster. I hope it would suffice.

Tuesday. My sister just started her on-the-job training at The Buffet, a restaurant located along Commonwealth, Quezon City. They are required to wear uniforms which included white long-sleeved blouses and black flats. My sister insisted on buying these items Tuesday afternoon. I didn’t want to go since I was tired from a long day at school, but I eventually went and waited for her at Starbucks while writing my notes. I drank an iced peppermint mocha (sorry, but I really prefer the taste of CBTL beverages. Good thing this isn’t a drink review), which will come into play later. Once we were together, we proceeded to shop and I discovered that there was an ongoing sale on women’s lingerie/underwear, so I went to buy 2 bras while she went looking for her tops. I also got to buy a pair of really comfortable beige flats! (Note that I didn’t want to go to the mall in the first place.) When we were having our items reserved, I suddenly realized that my phone, wallet, and handkerchief were gone. Nothing out of the ordinary happened in the last few moments, so it was really confusing. We talked with the mall management and asked for a review of the CCTV records, but it ‘just so happened’ that the cameras were focused on the merchandise and its view of me was cut. WOW. The biggest irony was that I’ve been planning to replace my wallet and phone for some time; I even have a replacement wallet ready at home since my wallet’s leather was peeling already. Also, I lost 600-700 Php with the wallet..and just moments before, I offered to pay for my flats which cost 600 Php.

Wednesday. I spent part of the weekend writing pre-laboratory protocols for one of my lab classes. Suddenly, we were informed the night before that we were going to do primer design instead of plant DNA extraction since some needed reagents were out of stock. Just when I finally didn’t cram my pre-lab notes, we didn’t have to use them. 😐 Furthermore, I think we spent more time figuring out how to install Beacon Primer Designer (a program) rather than the actual designing….

Thursday. My Archaeology class is held every Tuesday and Thursday, from 4-5:30 pm. Last Tuesday, a guy was added to our group, still making me the only girl in the group. I talked with him and found out that we were in the same year and that he also sings, among other things. I thought that he may be a potential crush and was even thinking of blogging about him. When we had class today (meaning Thursday), I realized that I felt no attraction to him at all. Oh heart, what a fickle ‘mind’ you have.

Friday. I was hurrying from my tissue culture lab class to my film class and was running late. I asked Violet (refer to past previous posts) if she could drive me there because I didn’t want to miss the movie we were going to watch, as we had to write a paper about it. When I got to the building (15-20 minutes late), all my classmates were waiting outside the room because it was locked. 😐 I even had to look for the person that our teacher supposedly left in charge of our class’ activities for that day. I hurried for nothing!! and wasted Violet’s gas allowance in the process of doing so. >_<

Saturday. I went to school for two reasons: to help out in the applicants’ orientation of my university’s floorball organization, which I’m applying for, and to attend my institute’s organizations’ practice for the carol-fest (a Christmas singing competition), which is taking place on December 6. I was running late because it was Bonifacio Day (look it up if you want 🙂 ) and my usual route was overcome with traffic. I couldn’t text anyone because I had no phone. When I arrived at the venue, there was no one. I wasn’t able to go online the night before, and had no updates as to whether the event was moved. Note that this was going to be the first meeting that I’d be attending this semester, and it was apparently moved to next week 😐 So I proceeded to my university’s main library, intending to study for my exams this following week. To my surprise, the library was closed! And with a face-palm, I realized it’s because of Bonifacio Day, yet again. I then went to my institute’s building to study there..only to pass the time exchanging stories with our resident guard.

A good thing though, was that I got the solo part I was pining for 🙂 However, I’ve been feeling under the weather since Wednesday/Thursday night (which is why I’ve only been sleeping for the past couple of nights instead of studying) and this sore throat keeps bugging me. Just when I finally get the part did I get sick. Why Universe/God, why? 😦

Hoping everything works out (and soon),

*******23

P.S. Currently reading From Genes to Genomes: Concepts and Applications of DNA Technology. Never thought I’d say this, but I actually find it fun and enlightening to read a textbook for once. This is awesome ❤